Kale is not big in South Dakota. Bison are. I recently learned that what we
usually think of as buffalo, are not, in fact, buffalo. There are no buffalo in North America. They are bison. Big, hirsute, menacing, be-horned, badass,
bison. Tasty too. Life surprises
you. Always. The uncertain becomes
inevitable in hindsight. Assessed future probabilities become naïve fever-dreams as
we look back. Anticipation is easy. Prediction is hard.
This race obliterated my expectations, turning them to dust
and, in so doing, did what ultras do. It
taught me some things about myself: about pain, about sacrifice, about Brain, and about
Heart. Bottom Line: I got a finish; but
it was ugly like a newborn.
The Lean Horse is a 100 mile race in Western South Dakota along
the Mickelson Trail. Starting in Custer it heads north for 50 miles, turns
around just south of Deadwood, where the ghost of Al Swearingen hurls
expletives from afar, and heads back
down to Custer. The surface is pounded stone atop compressed soil so has some
resiliency to it. The website says it climbs 7,100’, but my GPS only showed
4100’, at the end. The starting elevation is 5300’ and it climbs to 6200’, so being a Vermont guy living at 525’, I
knew the altitude would have an impact on me, but wasn’t sure how much. The race starts at noon on a Friday, so mid-packers
like myself are guaranteed to run through the entire night. This year featured
a full moon.
The Black Hills landscape is truly breathtaking.
The Black Hills landscape is truly breathtaking.
Some of the course parallels a
road, but most of it heads into the dales and valleys and winds its way around
and within some stunning terrain, through be-tunneled mountains after
dancing over rills and skipping by tarns.
I expected werewolves, but only saw two deer, a dead garter snake, and
an irritated vole.
I’ve only been racing ultras for three years and I’m not
sure that I have many established norms, but one I do have is that in February I plan
my season, which for me runs April to August, with some flexibility to run some
late-year races as well. Then, I promptly neglect to register for my favored
races, so that I miss out and must choose some other event. I followed that path this year, and didn’t get
the 50 miler or 50Ks that I wanted, but at least was smart enough to lock in LH
early on. So, I had something to look forward to.
For the past three years I’ve run a 100 miler as my
A-race. I knew (“knew,” bah) that I had
a real shot at a 100 Mile PR this year.
I ran a 22:24 at VT100 in 2018, a 22:39 at Rocky Raccoon in 2017, and
since this one was non-technical with rather tame vert, cooler, and with
frequent aid stations, I figured I could easily beat my best. If I trained with intention, it
was in the bag (Pro Tip- It is never in the bag.) Training w/AJW through CTS was a lot of fun.
The whole on-line coaching thing is a rather odd enterprise, and I have some thoughts about it, but I’ll save that for
another missive. Coach worked me hard,
giving me tough intervals, tempo runs, or steady state enduros twice per
week. These workouts, coupled with longs
on the weekend, really brought my fitness up a level. Between the beginning of
April and this race, I competed in a 50K, 50 Mi (PR), and did 100K during a 12 hr
timed race. I also did a Hades-hot 35 mi
training run in CT, and paced Sean Nakamura (great guy!) for the last 30 miles of VT100 in
July. In fact, the last three weeks of
my training block, my longs were 62, 30, and 35 miles. All humid (poor man’s
altitude training). I’d say I did the
work.
Back in June, my back went out on me. Nasty bit of business. You can read about it, here. I bounced back from that, dealt with an
enduring bitchy hamstring, and then continued my training block. I was feeling great. Then, 7 days out from this race, in the midst
of a delightful taper, my back strained out again. Well, damn that to Hell,
please. Horrible timing. It wasn’t as
bad as the June spasm, but it was there, it was super sensitive, and I was
pissed. I knew it would take 6 or 7 days
to heal, so I decided to let it go, relax, and carry on, knowing that this was going to be close. I didn't want to damage myself, of course, but also, I had invested a good bit of time and treasure into this race. After all, there was not a thing I could do about it at this point, and I was going to the race regardless. I woke
up on the travel day, the day before the event, and felt that the back, while
not fully in working order, was at least runnable. Still, and oddly, I was
feeling confident, chomping at the bit to race, and just wanted to run. So, I
left.
The trip out was largely uneventful. My planes were on time, the coffee was
strong, my layovers were reasonable, and
I had a hearty, if expensive, bacon, egg, and cheese on focaccia breakfast sandwich
in Chicago. It felt dainty though, and in hindsight, being that I was in the Windy City, I probably should have had a kielbasa. At the gate for the Dakota flight, I had the gawking great pleasure
to see a herd of western curly cue moustaches sitting on grizzled lips like
monarch larvae on milkweed. Cowpokes, chili-makers, and rustlers, all wondering
what they were doing in this century. Yes, of course they had Stetsons. And no. No chaps. Drat. I was looking forward to getting out there and racing,
true, but also wanted to feel the place, see the sites. Get eyes on the kitsch.
My back wasn’t great and I knew it, but I
basically ignored it. With vigor. I was looking ahead and exuberant.
Except, of course, for
that landing in Rapid City. That mitigated my exuberance not a little bit. I thought I
was going to die, in fact. I fly a lot, but this approach into the airport was bad, harrowing,
and I was the most nervous I’ve ever been in a plane.
We were down-angle on approach heading in to land when we began to be buffeted by
wind shears. They got worse and worse. Knocked about. Punched by Odin.
It was an E-ticket ride. Belt
cinched tight, I closed my eyes and quietly appreciated the Steely Dan in my
headphones- people were admonishing Rikki to not lose that number. Next thing I knew the plane changed angle, now ascending and accelerating aggressively up out of the nasty Hell-breath.
The pilot had apparently had enough and worked to get us and this lumbering machine
out. Good thing too. I'm sure the wings were about to fall off. Where is the Lorazepam when you need it? We rose from the mess, circled
the port a few times, came in from a different direction and landed safely. I
wanted a beer. I had one.
My race strategy was straight forward. Start slow.
Get slower. I created a highly-detailed
plan for a sub-20 hour race, starting at 9:45 miles and ramping it down from
there.I knew a sub-20 was not at all
realistic for me, but at least it gave me some targets to shoot for and it would be
interesting to see where and when in the race it came off the rails. I’d find
out soon enough.
I had dropped about 8 lbs since VT100 in the summer of 2018, trained hard, had a plan, was in good spirits, and had done my research. I was running light, with no vest or handheld until mid-race. Instead I opted for hands free and a collapsible cup kept in my belt. I would drink 21 oz of water per hour, and fuel with 200-250 cal of whatever I was craving. I was ready to execute. The whole course was runnable and I intended to run every inch. Get my toe to the line and let me run. Packet pick-up was effortless. In and out in minutes and done by 3pm.
My
back was persistently being an ass, so I went back to my room and laid down,
hoping that one more good night of rest would continue the healing of the
thing, and I’d be solid for the race, only 21 hours ahead of me. I slept, woke up, stretched the lumbar area
at length, had a great full breakfast at a biker restaurant (lots of leather
and Harley themed utensils), and walked around town wondering how Trump got
elected, and why there were such obnoxious t-shirts with his visage festooned
around town, and what ass-hat designed them.
The noon start came
quickly. We gathered at the line. I felt
no butterflies, just a confident calm.
The back was not in pain, just a bit tight and achy. The night’s sleep
helped. I was okay with that and figured
I could protect it and keep it all together by controlling my movement judiciously. We
started. It was in the 70s, sunny, and
dry. I tripped within the first quarter mile on flat pavement, looked like a
spaz, and was embarrassed. My plan
called for 9:45s for the first 15 miles so that is what I did. I wanted to go faster, but kept dialing it
down. The altitude wasn’t seeming to affect
me and this was surprising. I was drinking plenty and peeing
clear. No shortness of breath. My back
tweaked very slightly a couple of times.
I had to protect it better so I focused on stiffening my posture and
leaning a bit forward to relieve pressure.
I stopped to stretch it a few times.
Easy to maintain the pace. The
first 15 miles features a 5 mile gradual up and a 10 mile gradual down. Seemed easy to keep to plan. I passed the Crazy Horse monument to my
right. Huge, epic, and a stark reminder
of the white man’s fraught history with the Native Americans.
I got to the 15.7 mile aid station at Hill City about 7
minutes ahead of my plan and feeling great.
Running a bit stiff and upright because of the back, not at all fluid
and free, but getting it done. I
continued on, executing my plan without issue, now running 10 min miles. I was feeling good and optimistic. At mile 30.4
at the Mystic aid station, I stopped to drink and refuel and the ladies there
told me I was in 11th place.
There were 10 people ahead of me.
How about that. I knew I had a
long and gradual climb coming up between Mystic and Rochford at mile 38.2. Maybe I could reel some people in. But, I
committed to keep to my plan, which I did.
Ran my pace of 10:15s and 10:30s for the next 8 miles and ended up
passing 7 people, putting me in 4th when I got to Rochford. Wow.
Surprising. Getting tired and
sore, as you do, but well over a third of the way there and feeling solid. I
left Rochford well-fed and watered, thanked the volunteers with a salute and a
smile, and headed out on pace, looking forward to getting to the turnaround in
fewer than 12 miles. I ran, listening to 1970s light rock (Bread, Player,
America, Ambrosia, Pablo Cruise, Boz Scaggs, etc), and not at all ashamed of
loving it.
Then, around mile 42, I became conscious of a creeping deep full quad
pain in both legs. Shit. What is going on? I stopped and stretched them and it seemed to
help a bit, but I was kind of freaked out. The pain profile with my quads is
well known to me. It had happened in my
two previous 100 mile finishes and I know exactly what it feels like, but both times they
blew out at around mile 85. I fully expected it, but not yet. NOT YET! This was mile 43. I continued and the pain increased. My pace slowed from 10:30s to, like, 12s and
13s. I could barely jog. A couple folks
passed me. I was upset and mystified. Well, by mile 45, my quads were officially pulverized. So painful on so many levels.
I was in a situation. I didn’t know why it happened, but I was certain that my quads were done for this race and would not come back. I was shattered. I had been executing a plan that would have
gotten me a nice 21 or so hour finish, most likely. Now I couldn’t run and I had 55 miles ahead
of me. Crisis point. I had two
choices. To DNF or not to DNF. That was the question. I chose the latter. I DNF’d VT100 in 2017 in a mental collapse
after having missed a turn and running off course for several miles. I felt shame, disappointment, anguish,
regret, all of that. I didn’t like
myself for quitting back then, and I wouldn't like it now. Plus, in this race I was not
injured. Not really. And all I had in
front of me was a long walk. A long, long walk. I hiked the AT for God’s sake,
I think I can manage a packless hike. I
figured I had 15 hours ahead of me, 10 hours of that would be in the darkness. So, I strapped in for the long haul and decided
to get it done. I knew there would be no DNF. I wouldn't let it happen. Eyes forward, a burning focus to walk as fast
as I could (3.8 mph on average), and an eclectic selection of podcasts and
music. I listened and learned about the
metaphysical foundations of quantum physics (David Bohm is a freak), why
democracy is broken (hint:people are stupid), memory palace techniques (cue
Cicero), the Apollo moonshots (I remember it and I was 8), the opiate epidemic
(big pharma cynicism), and 19th C. English poetry (Hardy loves hard). All of the things.
Beyond that there is not much to say. I walked with purpose, sometimes rage. At one point I was so mad I literally wanted
to get challenged by a bear, bison, or some other large mammal and punch it in its great furry
head. Because that would show my quads
what’s what. At times I tried to jog for a minute or two then walk a minute,
then jog again. Stupid quads wouldn’t
have it. I cheered for the 17 or so racers
that passed me that last 55 miles but was, in fact, silently dismayed and just
a bit self-pitying, at times. I mean it
wasn’t their fault I suck.
But I can’t let the quad thing go, still. My quads gave up the ghost 40 miles before
they should have, given past performance. Something very specific went wrong,
and I don’t know what it is. So, here are some bullet points which perhaps can
inform an explanation and I would be happy to hear your assessment, fair readers:
·
It had to do with the altitude.
·
It had to do with the fact that I have been
intermittent fasting since April.
·
It had to do with my back issues.
·
It had to do with age and muscle atrophy.
·
It had to do with my training.
·
It had to do with running longer descents than I
am accustomed to, in spite of their shallow grades.
·
It had to do with abnormal fluid retention (my
hands were swollen to twice their size for most of the race).
[For what it is worth, I think my quad blowout was a
combination of a couple of things. I
think the primary driver was my back. I
ran to protect it, very consciously.
Consequently, my bio-mechanics, my gait, my posture were all slightly
(maybe more than slightly) different from my norm. I stiffened my spine, leaned forward, and avoided
hip/back torsion thus stressing different parts of my legs in different ways,
and I did this constantly and over several very long, though shallow, downslopes. At least this is my working hypothesis, informed
by the wisdom of my friend Richarda, a local personal trainer who runs the mile
at a high rate of speed. Richarda has a potty mouth. One time she said, "Shitballs" in the midst of a fun mid-winter hill workout.]
I rolled in with a time of 24:52, bandy legs wobbly, limping my way onto the
Custer High School track. Way slower
than I wanted or thought I’d run, but I do take some consolation that I hung
tough for the finish and that the time isn’t that bad considering I only ran
less than half of the race. A Pyrrhic victory, for sure. Perhaps I shall be made stronger
because of this. Nietzsche would think
so, but then he had syphilis. I
collected my buckle, drove to the hotel, showered, passed out on the bed, woke
up, limped to the bar, inhaled 10 large buffalo wings and more than a couple beers, limped
back, and slept another 12 hours.
I closed out
my journey the next day by visiting the Crazy Horse Memorial, Mt. Rushmore, and
Deadwood (I’m a huge fan).
I flew home
on Monday. Mission complete.
The race direction was superb. The RD, Royce Wuertzer, does a great job.
Registration is simple, updates are sent when necessary, and everything you
want to know can be found on the Lean Horse site. The aid stations are frequent at no more than
6 miles apart, most are 4-5 miles, and being an out and back, it is nice to see the volunteers
twice. A couple of things that they may
want to pay attention to is to have water available in pitchers vice having to
use the little spigots on the tanks. It
saves time in the aid station and allows more people to move through faster. Also, at night, all stations should have
ramen or some kind of hot soup. It was a
chilly night and it would have been great to warm up with some delicious
decadent warm salt broth with mushy carbs, puffy hands notwithstanding. Overall, I’d recommend this race to others. It should be bigger than it is. I
think it could be a good first 100 for those looking to take the plunge.
Thanks for reading.